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What You can't see... can hurt you! 

  Title: Gamma Ray Toaster




UselessTM Industries Product Recall notification:

One of our most quintessentially UselessTM products, the "Gamma-ray Toaster," seems to be causing some minor genetic abnormalities out there. If your toaster doesn't seem to be toasting toast properly but does leave you with that "tingling feeling" in your testicles/ovaries when you stand near it, you may have the Gamma-ray Toaster. If so, simply unplug the toaster and remove the casing. Reach in and remove the "mini-pile action core" from the unit and throw it away! No fuss, no muss, thanks to Nuclear Power!

Above is a sketch of what we believe the toaster to have looked like at one time.


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Useless Industries is John Powell Robert Stacy Robert Spande